Mind Games That Might Actually Fix Your Your Bad Habits
We all have bad habits we’d like to break. Maybe yours is mindlessly reaching for your phone and scrolling Instagram for 10 minutes before you even clock what you’re doing, or perhaps you find yourself reaching for a sweet fix after every meal even though you’re not hungry.
Even though you know these habits are no good for you, they can still feel impossible to break. But they’re not – with the right mindset you can rewire your patterns.
Why you get stuck in bad habits
‘We get stuck in repeated habits and patterns because, quite simply, the brain prefers what’s familiar,’ says Georgia Kohlhoff, a certified nutritionist, personal trainer and trainee counsellor and psychotherapist.
‘From a neurological standpoint, every time we repeat a behaviour – whether it’s emotional eating, procrastinating, or speaking to ourselves harshly – we’re reinforcing a neural pathway. The more we use that pathway, the stronger and more efficient it becomes, much like a well-trodden trail through a field. Over time, these behaviours become automatic, meaning we default to them not because they’re helpful, but because they’re easy.’
This is often referred to as the path of least resistance in the brain. Our nervous systems and brains are designed for efficiency, meaning they will take the quickest route, even if that route no longer serves us. A UCL study from 2017 proved this, asking participants to judge whether a pattern was moving left or right by nudging a handle. When they added a weight to the handle going left, making it more difficult to move, people started judging the pattern was moving to the right more to ‘avoid the effortful decision,’ say researchers.
‘Many of our stuck patterns are also coping strategies that once helped us survive or feel safe, even if they now feel frustrating or self-sabotaging. This is especially true for behaviours linked to stress, trauma, or unmet emotional needs. The brain doesn’t distinguish between “good” or “bad” habits – it only knows what’s been practised, repeated, and rewarded (consciously or unconsciously),’ adds Kohlhoff.
Getting stuck isn’t a sign of laziness or lack of willpower. It’s a sign of a well-practised pattern that your brain has learned to rely on.
Why your mindset is at the heart of your patterns
But what’s been learned can be unlearned. However, it will take work. ‘Breaking a pattern doesn’t happen by force – it happens by awareness, repetition and safety,’ says Kohlhoff. ‘Once we understand that our patterns aren’t random, we can approach them with more curiosity and less shame. That shift in mindset is powerful because it stops us from seeing ourselves as broken or failing, and starts to position us as learners in the process of change.’
Your mindset – or how you think and frame things – matters because it is responsible for how you talk to yourself, and we become our thoughts. If you believe every slip-up is a failure, you’ll likely keep slipping up or stop trying.
Instead, an open and solution-driven mindset can make a difference. ‘To break a pattern, you have to create a new one – this means deliberately choosing a different behaviour. It could be as simple as taking three deep breaths instead of reaching for a snack when stressed or pausing to reflect rather than reacting automatically. Each time you interrupt the old pathway, you’re weakening it. And each time you practise the new one, you’re strengthening that alternative route,’ says Kohlhoff.
‘The nervous system also needs to feel safe enough to change. If we’re constantly in a heightened or dysregulated state, we’ll revert to our most familiar patterns even if they’re unhelpful. That’s why grounding techniques, nervous system regulation and emotional support are often essential parts of behavioural change.’
Simply put, breaking patterns is a process of rewiring the brain through small, repeated choices. Mindset helps us do that without giving up when it doesn’t feel linear or fast.
How to shift your mindset to break patterns
As Kohlhoof says, building new habits is less about overhauling everything at once and more about consistent, intentional repetition even when it feels small or imperfect.
‘This is where mindset becomes more than just “thinking positively.” Mindset shifting means changing the way we relate to setbacks, discomfort, and slow progress. Instead of expecting instant transformation, we start to value the practice of showing up again and again, even when motivation fades or things feel messy,’ she says. ‘It helps you stay engaged with the process, not just the outcome. It helps you see habit-building not as a test of willpower, but as a gentle rewiring of the brain, one decision at a time.’
She recommends that pattern-breaking begins with small and specific goals. ‘The brain thrives on clarity and simplicity. Swap “eat better” for “add one protein-rich food to lunch” so you know what you need to do,’ she says.
Then, link new behaviours to existing routines. ‘This is known as habit stacking, for example, doing a two-minute breathing exercise right after brushing your teeth.’ It helps if the habit is rewarding, or you take time to notice the benefits of it. ‘This could be as simple as noticing how calm or energised you feel after, or tracking consistency in a way that feels encouraging, not obsessive,’ she says.
Expect resistance, she warns. ‘Your brain will default to the familiar at first not because the new habit isn’t “working,” but because the old one has a head start. This is normal.’
